The world can be a scary place. A lot of things right now could be causing you or your children anxiety and it is helpful to talk about it. Anxiety has a way of making a person feel like they are the only one that feels this way. That is why anxiety can be so isolating for a child, or an adult who is experiencing it.
You and or your child are not alone in your anxiety, and we want to help try and alleviate some of it. If the anxiety is getting to the point that it is hindering you or your child's daily life - it is time to seek professional help. If you are struggling with minor anxiety, on a waitlist to see a therapist, or actively seeking help and just looking for more tips this is the place for you! These are the top 5 things that parents just like you are doing today to help both themselves and their children address and alleviate their anxiety.
1 Acknowledge the Fear
Anxiety has so much more power inside a person's head than it does outside. Once someone starts to honestly verbalize what is causing them anxiety they usually feel a little bit better even if no solutions have been found. Just getting it out of your head and into a safe space can make a huge impact on both the isolation associated with anxiety and the feeling of being completely overwhelmed and consumed by it.
If you are experiencing anxiety (that is age appropriate to talk about with your child) bring it up to them. It doesn't have to be a whole big conversation if you don't want it to. If you are watching the news, or see a headline come across your phone that makes you anxious - voice it. Tell them that it is making you a little bit anxious. By just using the word and claiming that you get anxious sometimes too shows your child that you are a safe place to discuss anxiety.
Encourage them to do the same. Ask your child if they have ever felt anxiety. Ask them if anything about school, socializing, or just the world itself gives them anxiety. Do more listening that talking. Let them explain themselves and be cautious to not be dismissive. Your child may be worried about something that you have totally handled. However, instead of telling them they don't need to be worried about it express to them that you can see why they are worried and explain to them the things that you have done to make sure that whatever they are worried about does not happen. Let them know that you are always on their team and readily available to help them through their anxiety.
While it is good to get the conversation started, you don't want to pile your anxiety on top of your child's. A child is not the best place to go to acknowledge every fear you have but the idea remains true for you. Tell your partner, sibling, parent, friend, or neighbor about the anxiety you have been feeling. Make sure you are going to a person who you know will listen to you and acknowledge that fear. You may even be opening the door to allow them to feel comfortable doing the same with you, deepening your relationship together.
2 Recognize the signs of anxiety
You or your child may not know what you are feeling is anxiety. It can be hard to imagine all of the different ways that anxiety can impact a person and you may not even realize that what you or your child is experiencing is related to feeling anxious.
Did you know if your child is getting very snappy at you it could be anxiety? Yup, anxiety can sometimes make people irritable. It can be easy to get frustrated with your child when they are acting like this but sometimes it's deeper than them just not getting their way. Sometimes in their head they may be spiraling about something that they feel like is not going the "right" way and it makes them a little bit on edge.
Other common anxiety symptoms for both children and adults are persistent worrying, difficulty concentrating, changes in sleep habits, frequent emotional outbursts, avoidance, and so much more. There are few things that display just how connected physical and mental health are than anxiety! Did you know anxiety could cause dry mouth? How about excessive yawning? Click here to check out our blog on some of the other physical symptoms of anxiety that you or your child may experience.
3 Try what's worked for others!
Parenting a child who struggles with their anxiety can be tricky. You want to toe that line of being reassuring and a safe place to go while not enabling their anxious behavior that is doing them more harm in the long run. It can be really tough to decide what to do to help your child, especially when you're already exhausted and overextended.
The good news is - you're not the first parent to raise a child who struggles with anxiety and you're not the last! Other parents have been figuring it out as they go along, and many of them have had some strategies that have really helped their children feel less overwhelmed by their anxiety.
Click here to check out some of the most common anxiety related situations parents seem to find themselves in and some of the solutions that helped!
4 Plan now and thank yourself later
If you struggle with anxiety you know how hard it can be to think straight when you can feel your mind spiraling. It feels like things are going a million miles a minute and that whatever thing is making you anxious is the biggest deal in the whole world. It can feel like you may never get past what you are anxious about.
By planning ahead and creating an Emotional Safety Plan you can help your future self relax and get a little bit more centered the next time you're feeling anxious.
It really is that simple - do some thinking on what kinds of activities calm you down. What makes you feel zen? Is it your favorite album blaring from your car as you drive? Is it a phone call with your sister? Is it making a cup of tea and sitting on the porch? The Emotional Safety Plan is 100% customizable to the person who is creating it.
If you have never heard of an Emotional Safety Plan the good news is it's super easy and quick to create - and can even be a good activity for the whole family! Either print out Emotional Safety Plans for the whole family, or if you don't have it in you to wrestle with the printer you can grab a piece of notebook paper or even your phone's notes app.
Click here to read more about how to create an Emotional Safety Plan today with your family!
5 Protect your social battery
Have you ever been at a party and felt the moment you no longer wanted to be there? Even if all your favorite people are there, you love your outfit, and the party is fun - if your social battery is empty there's a chance you're having absolutely no fun at all.
As someone who has struggled with their social battery my whole life I can physically feel my social battery emptying and it causes me a lot of anxiety. It is this helpless feeling not being able to leave a social situation when you feel like you need to. It often causes me to come off irritable, quiet, or seemingly miserable to be there. That is not fair to myself to feel that way and it's not fair to the family and friends I am with to act that way.
That is why prioritizing my social battery has been a game changer for me! Now I am more in tune with how I am feeling about the amount of socializing I have done, and I know what to do to when I am feeling like my battery is empty or almost empty.
If you or your child struggles with socializing check out one of our most popular tip sheets to date - Understanding Your Child's Social Battery. This tip sheet is full of tips that can help both you and your child check in and prioritize your social batteries, helping to alleviate the anxiety associated with being social.
Anxiety is a lot. It's exhausting, it's isolating, but it doesn't have to have the power we oftentimes give it. If your or your child is struggling with anxiety give one or more of these tips a try! They have helped other parents just like you and they might be helpful on your lifetime journey of prioritizing you and your child's mental health.
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